Date #1

He's a pizza lover. We chatted briefly on Tinder, he made a couple of lame jokes. "What are you looking for on here?" "Primarily for people to give me free pizza," he responded. The day of the date I showed up 10 minutes early at my favorite spot. We chatted energetically for the first 10-15 minutes until he slowly started deflating. He briefly texted someone, started talking about living with his ex and his ex's cat. He yawned a couple of times. I laughed and said "I'm glad you find me entertaining." He started tying his shoelaces. I got the check and we parted ways with a handshake. I ask the universe to reimburse this hour of my time.